Tuesday, November 30, 2010

What has helped you recover/heal?


I'm doing a research assignment for a publisher and need your help. Here's my question for you: What has helped you recover/heal from an addiction, obsession, compulsion, issue, regret, shame, fear, or trauma of ANY kind?!

Feel free to include things a therapist, author, support group, friend, or family member taught you--whether the method is spiritual, relational, financial, educational, health-related, physical, psychological, or other type. It can be something simple or something long-term that has changed your life.

Mahalo Nui,


Theresa Oja said...

After going through a church split that got nasty towards my husband and I, we had to lean into the Holy Spirit. He led us to a church that gently walked us through our pain. Thank God for the Holy Spirit and the body of Christ.
Theresa Oja

Sandra said...

I'm going to use 'being misunderstood' by either my words or actions as my issue. I have found that the longer it takes to get before the Lord in prayer (and forgive) the longer I stay stuck in hurt feelings or offense. There is nothing like being quick to forgive (and/or repent) and watch what the Lord will do. I found healing and reconciliation quicker as a result. My emotions might not line up immediately (i.e., I may still be battling anger or worrying in my mind) but 'choosing' to do the right thing always honors God and it gives Him something to work with.

Sandra Witkowski

Ruth Thorogood said...

After a barrage of circumstances, broken promises, loss of a loved one, moving to a new country, loosing my company, loss of income and identity, I felt that God had abandoned me too. I found myself sucked into a deep sadness where I floundered not knowing what to do next.

A friend once said to me that we can be honest with God...that He can take whatever we dish out. So I did just that.

I told Him honestly about everything, while crying and pouring out all of my anxieties and disappointments. All the while I continued to read His word and trust Him that somehow we would find a way through this together.

Eventually my hurt subsided as His word and promises washed away the pain and began to give me strength. Then I was able to tell Him I was sorry for blaming Him, for being angry and self-absorbed. I knew that it was Him that brought me here because He had a plan and He had something special for me in the midst of everything but I would have to start to trust Him.

I found I was safest with God. There was no blame or shame, just love...unending love. He knew the right time for each redemptive step out of dispair. God was faithful to take my pain, the blame and sorrow..then bring me to a place of healing and a vision for the future.

Who I am has changed...because of His grace and mercy. What an amazing father we have!!

Anonymous said...

After a marital problem,the Lord grabbed us both and turned us around! We didn't even know about the Holy Spirit (other than a name in church), but He came and worked in our hearts. God is the Great Redeemer!

Etta said...

In June 2010, just 4 months after my husband of 34 years passed away after a five year battle with ALS, I was attending New Way Ministries School of Spiritual Direction in Colorado Springs. I was starting to get excited as I prepared to launch a new ministry after 5years of caring for my husband. One of the assignments was to join a group of 6-7 others to lead worship one of the mornings of our time together. Since our day was coming up soon, I quickly rounded up the others on my team and asked each one if they had an idea about
how they wanted to contribute....and suggested when we
could get together to plan. Each one was very cooperative and cordial but there was a younger man who seemed to be taken aback by my take charge behavior.In response to my question, he said,
"I might dance if you twist my arm". I sort of laughed along but managed to get everyone on the same page for a planning meeting.
On that day, thw young man, whose name was Cory, soon emerged as the leader, which made perfect sense once I was told that he was a worship leader at his church.
I had thought a lot about what I wanted to do myself but someone else also wanted to share a song and theirs was chosen. I sat quietly as everyone found their niche and got their assignment trying to think what I wanted to do. When Cory finally got to me, I still wasn't sure what I wanted to do. He said, "Well, if you come up with something, let me know....we need someone to close in prayer if you would do that."
I was soooooo hurt and offended and couldn't really understand why but mostly I just wanted to hide because I didn't want my flesh to be revealed in front of my classmates. Later that evening,with our worship time coming up the next day, Cory stopped me outside the dining room and said, I need to know what you are going to do." I was getting really mad by then and excused myself to go back to my room where I proceeded to meltdown, crying and feeling sorry for myself....wondering why I was being treated unjustly, especially since I was still in the grief process. One of the ladies I had met kept beating on my door and begged me to let her in... When I finally did and explained why I was so upset about being left out of the team, she said very gently,
"I was there, Etta, you didn't hear it right" That was so profound to me and I have never had a conflict since that I didn't hear her saying that and it helped me to stop and clarify and confront if I needed to but no longer be so easily offended, walking in past rejection and keeping up a cycle of hurt that was
usually more perception (albeit wrong)than reality. It was a huge turning point for me and helped me grow relationally more than anything before or since.
Etta Webster

Lorraine McFarland said...

I was, once again, going through some marital problems and my husband and I were separated. Many times I asked him, even begged him, to go to a marriage counselor. But each time he refused. One day he said to me, "I'm not the one with the problem you are." Needless to say his comment did not sit well with me. In truth, I was furious. I dare him put all the blame on me!

Well after much soul searching I realized, as the words echoed in my head, that I had heard the same words from previous marriages, "You don't love me.You don't need me." I wondered how that was even possible to here those same words from each one of them. Then I heard another echo, "3 strikes and you're out!" So I decided to see a counselor alone.

Boy did I ever get the surprise of my life. During one of our sessions I broke down and told the biggest secret of my life. The silence was finally broke!

From that day God led me on an unbelievable journey. Unfortunately, as the journey began, my husband passed away only a few short months later and all of a sudden my life was upside down and I hit bottom. I felt I had no purpose in living. How could life get any worse. Yet God knew different; He had a plan for my life. One day He picked me up from the mirey clay and sent me on journey to the ultimate healing.

Since then I share my story everytime I have a chance in hopes that someone else will receive the release of the shackles of silence and torment.

I have been released from a self defined prison and gone from total silence all the way to sharing in a 3rd world country. The journey has been amazing. All of it made possible through the Love of God.

I know today God truly has a plan for each of our lives and I want to share with everyone.